Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Work Life Balance is a Crock? So What.

If I see one more person belittling the notion of balance or the myth of balance or the like, I’m going to reach through the screen and punch him. Or her. Or you? Yes, there’s no such thing as work/life balance. Yes, there’s no way to “have it all.” Yes, you are superior and far too intelligent and sophisticated to indulge in such fantasies.

But here’s the thing. Most of you could have more of what you do want and less of what you don’t want in your life than you are choosing now. If you’re not “choosing” at all, then shame on you. This is the one life you have. Each day, you have just 24 hours. Not 24 hours for work and 24 for everything else. Not 24 hours for yourself and 24 hours for your partner, your family, your beloved pets, your friends.
You are not a hero for consistently being “so busy” and “exhausted” and “up since 3am” and “up 'til midnight” with “no time for working out” or “so thankful for my partner is OK with never seeing me.” Let me tell you, with love- you are squandering your life. Not just because of how you spend your time, but how you think and talk about it. For goodness’ sake, stop talking about it. If you are SO unhappy and frustrated with how you spend your time and what you get in return, then do something about it. If you “can’t say no”- figure it out or stop complaining. Or celebrate it! Come clean and say that your balance is your joy, it’s not the balance others might choose, but it’s what you choose. Tell me; “I’m exhausted and living on junk food and Red Bull, but I’m so satisfied with how much I’m contributing; the impact I’m making is worth everything to me.”  I will celebrate alongside you.

If you’re the one saying “I haven’t got enough clients, I’m not sure how I’m going to meet my expenses”- add either “help please, give me a marketing plan and I’ll execute it consistently and track results” or “I love living on the edge like this, it’s all worthwhile for the magnificent feeling of freedom that I have.”

All in. 100%. You choose the targets. Money, how you spend your time, relationships, faith, impact, fitness and fun. The mix should give you joy. If you never hit 100%, the game is in how close you get, your happiness and satisfaction. You are responsible for it. You aren’t a victim. I don’t give a crap what you want. Your choice. I care a LOT about you getting what you want. I care a LOT that you take responsibility for your life.

Bottom line? Everyone has constraints. Shit does happen to nice people who deserve the best and do everything “right.” But YOUR happiness and YOUR success are just that. Yours. Do what it takes to be your best and do your best, for you and for the people you care about.

Stop wasting your time and mine making fun of the idea of “balance.”  Can’t take it seriously? Don’t. Be clear on what you DO take seriously, and choose that in everything you do.